EFNWrestling | Drugs are a Hell of a Drug

Oriadon wrote:

Captain2 wrote:

Oriadon wrote:

- - - - -
[i]*The EFNW Tag Team Champions, William L. Davis IV and Coty Weston, are backstage playing cards, feeling a bit bored when Neville Ryan walks up to the table.*

Neville stands there for a moment, sizing the champions up before extending his hand

"Hello there, I'm sure introductions are unneeded but I'm Neville Ryan. Nice to meet the pair of you"

*William puts his cards down and stands up, looking at Neville before smiling.*

William Davis: Of course I know who you are, Neville Ryan! Nice job with Twista XL. My associate here cringed at that match, and he's seen some rough stuff. Name's William L. Davis IV, and my associate's known as the Desert Eagle, but you can call him Coty Weston.

*William shakes Neville's hand.*

William Davis: So what brings you here?

"The Desert Eagle? well he certainly sounds like a man of high calibre...." Neville says, stopping momentarily to look pleased with himself for his pun.

"and I'm here to carve myself a new path, the last company I was with went under while I was still the World Champion so I'm coming here with a lot of momentum behind me. Not to mention a level of merchandising befitting an undefeated champion" he answers

Captain2 wrote:

Oriadon wrote:

Captain2 wrote:

Oriadon wrote:

- - - - -
[i]*The EFNW Tag Team Champions, William L. Davis IV and Coty Weston, are backstage playing cards, feeling a bit bored when Neville Ryan walks up to the table.*

Neville stands there for a moment, sizing the champions up before extending his hand

"Hello there, I'm sure introductions are unneeded but I'm Neville Ryan. Nice to meet the pair of you"

*William puts his cards down and stands up, looking at Neville before smiling.*

William Davis: Of course I know who you are, Neville Ryan! Nice job with Twista XL. My associate here cringed at that match, and he's seen some rough stuff. Name's William L. Davis IV, and my associate's known as the Desert Eagle, but you can call him Coty Weston.

*William shakes Neville's hand.*

William Davis: So what brings you here?

"The Desert Eagle? well he certainly sounds like a man of high calibre...." Neville says, stopping momentarily to look pleased with himself for his pun.

"and I'm here to carve myself a new path, the last company I was with went under while I was still the World Champion so I'm coming here with a lot of momentum behind me. Not to mention a lot of merchandising" he answers

William Davis: If you're thinking long-term, a different company might be a better idea. We came in with plenty of momentum too, won the tag team titles, and nothing's happened since. This place is as like to forget you as promote you, no matter how well you do.

Oriadon wrote:

Captain2 wrote:

Oriadon wrote:

Captain2 wrote:

Oriadon wrote:

- - - - -
[i]*The EFNW Tag Team Champions, William L. Davis IV and Coty Weston, are backstage playing cards, feeling a bit bored when Neville Ryan walks up to the table.*

Neville stands there for a moment, sizing the champions up before extending his hand

"Hello there, I'm sure introductions are unneeded but I'm Neville Ryan. Nice to meet the pair of you"

*William puts his cards down and stands up, looking at Neville before smiling.*

William Davis: Of course I know who you are, Neville Ryan! Nice job with Twista XL. My associate here cringed at that match, and he's seen some rough stuff. Name's William L. Davis IV, and my associate's known as the Desert Eagle, but you can call him Coty Weston.

*William shakes Neville's hand.*

William Davis: So what brings you here?

"The Desert Eagle? well he certainly sounds like a man of high calibre...." Neville says, stopping momentarily to look pleased with himself for his pun.

"and I'm here to carve myself a new path, the last company I was with went under while I was still the World Champion so I'm coming here with a lot of momentum behind me. Not to mention a lot of merchandising" he answers

William Davis: If you're thinking long-term, a different company might be a better idea. We came in with plenty of momentum too, won the tag team titles, and nothing's happened since. This place is as like to forget you as promote you, no matter how well you do.

Neville smirks

"Well it would be foolish of them to hold me back, I have a history with everyone here. Surge and I used to take turns beating the hell out of Casey Anomaly, Cyrus was... for lack of a better term, my personal punching bag. I'm the kind of guy who comes in like a hurricane and nobody will be left standing."

*Williams nods.*

William Davis: That certainly sounds impressive. This place tends to welcome back old members with ope arms...

Oriadon wrote:

*Williams nods.*

William Davis: That certainly sounds impressive. This place tends to welcome back old members with ope arms...

"Just keep an eye out and you'll see" he says with a smirk before pulling off his "Neville Ryan #1" armband and handing it to William.

"Here, to my number 1 fan"

Omega walks around backstage, and wonders why his controller didn't center the text.

Surge's dead body is laying out in the hallway.

[b]i fucking kill surgee the fucking cunttt
ds['n]

Brooklyn Rage! wrote:

Omega walks around backstage, and wonders why his controller didn't center the text.

Again, why did his controller not center the text, Omega asks himself as he lifts some weights in the gym.

The show will be up...soon...or something. I'm gay.

The Legend of Casey wrote:

I Fap to Noeleen wrote:

Surge's dead body is laying out in the hallway.

Casey Anomaly is flying around the hallways like Christopher Walken in Weapon of Choice by Fatboy Slim when he come across Surge's body. He lands and just looks down at him and kicks his motionless body. He stares at him for a few minutes.

"Fuck... me him and Cyrus are supposed to rape every one's eye sockets next weekend in PNH.. now what.."

Casey just continues staring at his friend father waiting for him to move or some shit.

Nope.

The Legend of Casey wrote:

I Fap to Noeleen wrote:

Surge's dead body is laying out in the hallway.

Casey Anomaly is flying around the hallways like Christopher Walken in Weapon of Choice by Fatboy Slim when he come across Surge's body. He lands and just looks down at him and kicks his motionless body. He stares at him for a few minutes.

"Fuck... me him and Cyrus are supposed to rape every one's eye sockets next weekend in PNH.. now what.."

Casey just continues staring at his friend father waiting for him to move or some shit.

Neville approaches Casey with his usual look of smug self satisfaction before he notices Surge laying in the middle of the hallway.

"Dammit Anomaly. Did you roofie him?" Ryan demands to know

The Legend of Casey wrote:

Captain2 wrote:

The Legend of Casey wrote:

I Fap to Noeleen wrote:

Surge's dead body is laying out in the hallway.

Casey Anomaly is flying around the hallways like Christopher Walken in Weapon of Choice by Fatboy Slim when he come across Surge's body. He lands and just looks down at him and kicks his motionless body. He stares at him for a few minutes.

"Fuck... me him and Cyrus are supposed to rape every one's eye sockets next weekend in PNH.. now what.."

Casey just continues staring at his friend father waiting for him to move or some shit.

Neville approaches Casey with his usual look of smug self satisfaction before he notices Surge laying in the middle of the hallway.

"Dammit Anomaly. Did you roofie him?" Ryan demands to know

Casey completely imagines going off and just looks down at him for a moment.

"Nope. This is a usual Surge thing. Its the only way he gets any sleep. You can't see it but under his mask his eyes are actually open. You should know. remember you hired him to try and kill me basically back in our home company?"

Casey chuckles.

"Yeah, that was money well spent. Not only did my time as owner get a ratings boost from it but the two of you kept going at one another, allowing me to make a beeline right for Cyrus and become the undefeated champion when I jumped over to here" Neville says quite pleased with the situation

"Not to mention my contract is quite fitting of someone who manages a feat like that"

SURGE SHOW OPENER

Quote :

Surge comes out to start the show, and the crowd shits their pants! Kawaita shinzou no oto awai uwagoto. Shaku ni sawaru nante ki ni shiteru kara ni kimatten jan . Soredemo shinjite shiawase ni naru you ni reigi tadashiku. Mazu wa sasai na aisatsu toko kara. ARE YOU FAGGOTS READY, OR WHAT?? Everyone is really into Surge’s awesome-ass theme, so he grabs a mic and starts laying down the law. First, though, he makes fun of Cairo. He talks about how much of a big, stupid doodoo head Cairo is, reminding him of some fags with the surname of Jericho, but dat shit don’ mattah right nao, homie. He says that since he has one show as the general manager, it’s gonna be awesome. AS FUCK~!! So, for the main event, it’s gonna be…CYRUS BLACK VS OMEGA IN A NON-TITLE MATCH~!! AAAAAWWWWWWWWWWWWSSSHHHIIIIITTTTTSSSOOOONNNN!! The crowd is going cerbaples, but Surge isn’t done. Nova really screwed Riff at Interactive Anarchy, and since Surge doesn’t like Nova, it’s gonna be Nova vs Riff again…TONIGHT~!! And not only that, both of those nuqqas will…HAVETHEIRHANDSTIEDBEHINDTHEIRBACKAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHH~!! Wait, but Surge STILL isn’t DONE~!! Because, since wrestling has really hit a plateau in terms of women’s wrestling which has now hit EFNW like those less-important and faggish other companies, EFNW competition will now be…INTERGENDER AND INTERSPECIES~!! Now everyone will know the true athletes, ‘cause no one is barred from competing. Oh, and one more thing…SURGE IS GONNA COMMENTATE THE WHOLE SHOW WITH BOB SPARKS AND TYSON SHOOTER BECAUSE THEY’RE FAGS AND HE’S AWESOME~!! And Surge still isn’t done- whoa, whoa, whoa, Surge. Robert Cairo comes out and begins to insult Surge, commenting on how uncivilized and shit he is. Surge ain’t not gangsta according to Cairo, he’s just a punk-ass bitch looking for attention. Surge and Cairo go back and forth until Cairo all of a sudden leaves, with Surge just standing there in the ring. Swag.

[0:10/2:00]

FIGHT MONEY vs MATT XTREME and FRIENDS

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Surge is in fact not commentating the entire show, ‘cause he left. Matt decided to start out against Coty when- OH, POOP~!! Coty just goes straight after Matt! Matt doesn’t even have time to be a douche as Coty beats him around the ring and all that good shit! Coty throws Matt around a little- ELBOW~!! Matt gets some separation and goes for a kick – no! Coty catches it- ENZUIGIRI!! Matt scrambles to his corner and tags Amazo in- SPRINGBOARD DROPKICK~!! El Amazo comes in like a Mexican enchilada with hot sauce as he goes after Coty with a mierda-load of Armdrags followed by a sweet-ass dropkick! Amazo sees Davis coming in and gives him some Armdrags too! Armdrags for everyone! Weston out of nowhere! While Amazo was busy with Davis, Weston got him from behind, as if they were in jail! Except this is Coty Weston, not Debris! If it was Debris, it would be really awful for Amazo. Matt screams at Amazo to do stuff as Coty throws him around with SUPLEXES and HIP-TOSSES and CLOTHESLINES~!! Coty then tags in Davis and they double-team the shit out of Amazo! It’s like those gang-land-style beatings he experienced as a kid in Tijuana! Amazo is like a cornered animal, and remembering those moments, gets fired up and starts going crazy with a barrage of I-don’t-know-what-the-fuck-I’m-doing strikes! Amazo is throwing out chops, punches, everything! Davis and Weston are dazed as Amazo goes for the tag to the screaming Xtreme! He’s got it, he’s got the tag- NO!! Davis and Weston pull Amazo back into the ring and start stomping the shit out of him. Davis starts dropping elbows and all that good shit as Weston taunts Matt from the apron. Matt runs into the ring to kick Weston’s ass, but the ref stops him! And in a classic instance, Weston gets back in the ring as Davis hits Amazo with the Bottom Dollar! Amazo is out on his feet as Davis lifts him up – BLACKJACK!! Weston gets out of the ring as Davis gets the ref’s attention from Matt and pins. One…two…THREE~!!

[0:15/2:00]

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Weston and Davis take their tag titles and leave with smirks on their faces as Xtreme gets into the ring and in something extremely uncharacteristic of himself, looks worried. He gets out of the ring and grabs two chairs, placing one down for Amazo and another for himself. Xtreme helps Amazo onto the chair and sits down on the other before getting a mic. He talks about how even though he’s been a real dick, he still wants to acknowledge people who have helped him and all that good shit. A lot of people are confused as Xtreme thanks Amazo for working so hard and apologies for them constantly losing. Matt gets up and paces about the ring as he continues with his monologue before Amazo himself gets up. He pats Matt on the back as Matt looks at Amazo with the most sincere look in his eyes and says…”I hate your fucking guts”. BAM!! Straight in the nuts!! The crowd goes into boos as Matt grabs one of the chairs and KAPLOW~!! Right in the kisser! Amazo is laid out as the fans boo Matt for laying out their real Mexican hero, G.I. Amazo. Matt doesn’t give a fuck, though, ‘cause he just tells Amazo to fuck himself before leaving the marvellous Mexican in the ring for dead.

[0:20/2:00]

GINA KOBA PROMO TIME

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Backstage we see Gina Koba. GINA FUCKING KOBA~!! She isn’t in her gear or anything, though. In fact, she’s packing her stuff. We see Gina walk out of her locker room and down the hallway before the camera fades out.

[0:21/2:00]

[COMMERCIAL]

NOELEEN PHOENIX vs PETER LINCH

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TATAKAAAAAAAUUUUUUUUUUU!!!
The bell rings and immediately Linch goes for his signature Running Tilt-a-whirl Lariat, however Noeleen has seen many matches of Linch's and knows exactly how to reverse it! Noeleen then does a backflip before springboarding off the second rope and hitting Linch with a FLYING ROUNDHOUSE KICK FROM HELL! Noeleen tries putting Linch in the Nozzlelock, but Linch deadlifts Noeleen and HITS HER WITH AN AMAZING BRIDGING GERMAN SUPLEX FROM THE DEEP BLUE SEA!!! The ref goes to count but Noeleen kicks out right away! Linch tries getting to his feet, but Noeleen is so quick that she gets up before he does and then slams him with an EMERALD FLOWSION! Oh MY god! This match is INSANE. Noeleen THEN goes for a BACKBREAKER from the TOP rope, but Linch reverses it into a GOD DAMN HURRICANRANA! Oh, WAIT! Noeleen JUST reversed the REVERSAL into a ohmygodIRISHFLIPPINGPILEDRIVERFROMIRISHHELL!!!!!!!!!! Noeleen pins..... 1.................. 2.................. LINCH KICKS OUT!!!!!!!!!!!!! Noeleen then gets so pissed that she begins slapping and backfisting the shit out of Linch, rendering him pretty much retarded for the time being. Noeleen then KICKS! him in the KNEE before bouncing off the ROPES and hitting a SICKENING SHINING WIZARD!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! +50 POINTS FOR NOELEEN!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Linch only has ONE LIFE LEFT!!!!!!!! Noeleen CHARGES UP............................. "HADOUKEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEENNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNN!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Noeleen HIT Linch WITH a HADOUKEN!!! Noeleen PINS.................................... 1.................................................... 2.............................................................................................. 3!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! YES, NOELEEN WON THE FIRST EVER INTERGENDER SINGLES MATCH IN EFNW HISTORY SINCE CUJO AND MARIK AND ADAM TOOK OVER!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! YEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

[0:28/2:00]

ANGEL RODRIGUEZ PROMO TIME

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We go backstage and see…ANGEL RODRIGUEZ~!! Yes, that’s right, the Mexican aristocrat is looking all swagged out with his big nigga Victor Elias behind him, also swagged out. Oh, and he’s with that fag interviewer Bill Mayne. Boy, do I wish EFNW had awesome interviewers like Bobby Ballsack. Angel talks about how he still has that rematch for the World Title that Travis Jones didn’t give him, and with Travis Jones gone, even for the moment, he plans to not only take advantage of the moment, but get it drunk, take it home, rape it, then murder it and get away with said murder. Wait, no, Angel wouldn’t say that. Instead he would say that – AY, YO~!! Wait, Angel wouldn’t say that either-HOLY SHIT, IT’S TWISTA XL~!! Twista grabs the mic and steps in front of Angel, ‘cause he just don’t give a fuck, nigga! Angel looks disgusted and Elias goes to rape Twista, but Angel tells him to wait. Twista starts talking a bunch of shit on Neville Ryan – Angel interrupts. “Excuse me, my good man, but I was having an interview.” “Ay, yo, fuck yo’ mo’fuckin’ couch, nigga!” Elias steps up to Twista, but Twista just tells both of them to fuck themselves ‘cause this is time for a real man’s interview. Things are getting hot and heavy- whoa there, boys! It’s Surge! He walks into the shot as Angel, Elias and Twista all look at him. He looks back and tells them…it’s gonna be Twista vs Angel…TONIGHT~!! Angel and Twista have a stare-down as Surge gangsta walks away.

[0:32/2:00]

[COMMERCIAL]

AWESOME PRE-RECORDED PROMO TIME

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Then some awesome-ass pre-recorded interviews played with Cyrus motherfucking Black and Casey Anomrape. They had dramatic music in the background and all dat gangsta shit. They were edited all nice and pristine and all that good shit. Casey talked about how he was so close to beating Cyrus, how he even made Cyrus doubt himself there for a moment. He followed up with how he looks forward to his next match against Cyrus, commenting on how much he’s grown as a wrestler and all that good shit. Cyrus talked about how close Casey came too, Hell, he was the only person who ever made Cyrus tap. Big accomplishment right there. But that’s Casey’s problem: he always comes so close, but no cigar. Cyrus Black is the best wrestler in the World, and there isn’t anyone who can take that away from him. Can you say, “best time filler ever”? I can.

[0:40/2:00]

RIFF RADLEY w/ GEORGE the CAMERAMAN vs ALEX NOVA - HANDS TIED BEHIND BACK

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Riff looked mad as fuck as his hands were tied his back. This was prolly because he had to try harder to choke to death now, since he couldn’t use his hands. It was bitter-sweet for Nova too, since he couldn’t put his hands up to cower in fear, or use a chloroform cloth and all that good shit. George seemed frustrated too, since Nova beat his ass at Interactive Anarchy and he was too much of a pussy to do anything about it. Riff and Nova started the match with some circling before coming in with some kicks and all that good shit. AND RIFF WITH THE HEADBUTT~!! Nova stumbled back but couldn’t catch himself since he can’t use his hands as Riff headbutts him again, and again! And kicks the shit out of him! Nova is at a

[COMMERCIAL]

Quote :

advantage as he hits Riff with a roundhouse kick as we come back from commercial! During the break, Nova distracted the ref and managed to get his hands out from behind him and pummelled Riff! He then put his hands behind his back again as the ref turned back around. And that was really the only interesting thing that happened in this whole match. The kick and headbutt fest continues for a little more as Nova and Riff exchange blows! Really, if they didn’t have their hands tied, people would think they were retarded. I mean- REF BUMP~!! The ref goes down as Nova scrambles to get his arms out from behind him! Riff looks at Nova confused for a moment before charging him- DOUBLE AXE HANDLE~!! Nova takes advantage of the ref being down and begins to pummel Riff with his tied hands! Riff kicks and headbutts Nova, but with the use of his arms, Nova wrestles the advantage from Riff! Riff is really at a disadvantage here. Nova continues the assault – oh, shit, the ref is getting up! Nova scrambles to tuck his hands back behind him as Riff takes this time to recover. Riff sees the ref getting up, but stops giving a fuck because Nova’s a douche and un-tucks his hands from behind his back. He goes to charge Nova, but the ref steps in. The ref warns Riff as Nova taunts Riff to come at him…bro. Riff doesn’t give a shit, though, as he rushes past the ref and starts pummelling the shit out of Nova! Nova can’t even cover himself as now the tables have turned! Ding, ding, ding! It’s a DQ, but Riff doesn’t give a shit!

Riff just keeps pummelling the shit out of Nova as the ref tries to get him off! But Riff is pissed! The ref finally manages to create some separation- fuck you! Riff shoves the ref out of the way and- NOVA ESCAPES!! Nova rolls under the bottom rope and quickly un-tucks his hands before running up the ramp. He looks at Riff with a smirk and taunts him some more as Riff is left steaming in the ring.

[0:50/2:00]

NOELEEN PHOENIX PROMO TIME

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The camera catches up with Noeleen Phoenix backstage as she has her Vixen’s Championship and trophy with her after her match with Peter Linch. John Hardcore asks Noeleen some questions, like competing against Lara at Interactive Anarchy, and what’s next for her. Noeleen answers that while Lara was a good opponent, she seemed to be a real bitch in her last days in EFNW and it was really relieving to beat her on her way out. As for the future? Well, she kicked Peter’s ass, and there are a lot of other guys she wants to make cry. Also, Surge is a bastard.

[0:53/2:00]

HARRY JONES PROMO TIME + OTHER STUFF

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ANTI-HERO~!! It’s Harry motherfucking Jones, nigga! HARRY MOTHERFUCKING JONES!! He comes down to the ring, all gangsta and shit, and grabs a motherfucking mic! AAAAAAAAHHH, WE LOVE YOU, HARRY JONES!! Fat girls love Harry Jones. And Harry loves fat girls. He starts taking a bunch of shit on Dustin Shore, calling him a yellow-belly ruffian and the like. This continues for 5 good minutes – DUSTIN SHORE!! Dustin is tired of Harry’s shit and comes to the ring! He grabs a mic and starts talking down to Harry, since 12 year-olds aren’t really that tall. Dustin explains how Harry is butthurt about how awesome Dustin is and tells Harry to just move on, Dustin is the better man. He seas that Harry is mad, and tells Harry not to be such a beach. The back-and-forth continues for some more minutes- MIC SHOT~!! Harry is tired of the verbal exchange and attacks Dustin! Harry pummels Dustin with the mic some more before laying in some kicks! Dustin is dazed as- CLOTHESLINE!! Out of nowhere, Dustin floors Harry with a clothesline! Harry scrambles up- ANOTHER ONE!! And another! And anoth- Harry ducks! Superkick! Dustin drops and rolls out of the ring as Harry rebounds of the parallel ropes and SUICIDE DIVE!! Both go tumbling toward the ramp as the fight continues! Both men get back up and start exchanging punches! But since Dustin is a badass rapist motherfucker he gets the advantage! Harry goes stumbling around the ring as Dustin persist and continues kicking Harry’s ass! CHAIR SHOT!! Harry pulled a chair from under the ring and smashed Dustin over the head! Dustin reels back as Harry readies the chair again and…ANOTHER SHOT!! AND ANOTHER!! Dustin falls backwards as Harry jumps onto him and starts laying in more chair shots! Dustin tries to fight the current that is Harry’s punches as Harry gets the advantage! Harry leaves Dustin to recover on the floor as he goes under the ring again and…A TABLE!! HARRY HAS A FUCKING TABLE!! He begins to set up the table- he sees Dustin recovering! Harry walks over to Dustin- CHAIR SHOT!! Harry forgot about the chair and Dustin quickly sat up and smashed him over the head! Dustin throws the chair into Harry’s face before running in with a boot! Harry stumbles as Dustin grabs him and throws him into the barricade before laying in more punches! EYE RAKE!! Dustin shouts as he covers his face with his hands and Harry stomps him! Harry grabs a kendo stick from under the ring…BAM!! Dustin goes down again as Harry pounces on him and begins to choke him! EYE RAKE!! FROM DUSTIN!! Harry now can’t see as Dustin has kinda recovered! He grabs the kendo stick and starts laying into Harry! Dustin grabs the table and finishes setting it up before going back to Harry- kick to the nuts! Dustin falls to his knees as Harry backs up a little and…RUNNING SHIN KICK!! Harry grabs Dustin and lays him over the table before jumping up onto the apron with his back turned. He’s going for a Moonsault, he’s going for a Moonsault, HE’S GOING FOR A MOONSAULT- NO!! Dustin gets up off the table without Harry noticing him and uses the table to quickly jump onto the apron behind Harry! Dustin lays some shots into Harry but Harry retaliates with some kicks! Harry creates some space between him and Dustin and…SPRINGBOARD CROSSBODY FROM THE TURNBUCKLE!! NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!! DUSTIN CAUGHT HARRY!! DDUUSSSTTTIIINNNNN CCCAAAUUUGGHHHTTT HHHHAAAARRRYYYY!!! SHORE LEAVE!! SHORE LEAVE OFF THE APRON!! SHORE LEAVE OFF THE APRON AND THROUGH THE FUCKING TABLE!! OFF THE APRON AND THROUGH THE FUCKING TABLE!! Dustin gets up and stands over the murdered Harry Jones with a smirk before walking off as EMTs and staff rush down to check on Harry.

[1:12/2:00]

RAVE TIME

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We go backstage and…RAVE!! UNCEUNCEUNCEUNCEUNCEUNCEUNCEUNCE!! Surge is raving in Robert Cairo’s office with a bunch of hoes and tricks!! It’s pretty trashed, since this is a pretty awesome rave. Robert Cairo walks in on this and obviously gets mega pissed- PLEASE STAND BY!!

Spoiler:

[1:18/2:00]

ANGEL RODRIGUEZ vs TWISTA XL

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Twista XL Vs Angel Rodriguez
Twista is just entering the ring after smoking a joint with some fans, when suddenly ANGEL comes OUT of nowhere and PUNTS him in the ABDOMEN! Angel THEN tries suplexing Twista into the ring, but Twista reverses AND suplexes Angel INSTEAD! Wait, no, MEXICAN PRIDE AS ANGEL REVERSES AND LANDS ON THE APRON ALSO! Yes, Angel THEN goes for SOME type of KICK but Twista ducks that shit and chops Angel right in THE THROAT! Twista then attempts a Frankensteiner, but Angel counters it AND POWERBOMBS HIM ON THE FUCKING APRON!!!! Angel pulls Twista into the ring and pins.... 1.......... 2......... Twista kicks out! Angel then starts choking Twista until the ref has to force Angel off of him. Twista then uses this to his advantage and LEAPS OVER THE REF AND DESTROYS ANGEL WITH A FLYING BLOCKBUSTAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! TWISTA PINS!!!!!!!!! ...........1...................... 2.................... ANGEL KICKS OUT! HOLY SHIT, HOW DID ANGEL KICK OUT OF THAT DEVESTATING MOVE?!?!??! Twista then TWISTA'S UP and begins punching Angel in the face reapetedly! Twista then springboards off the ropes and

[COMMERCIAL]

Quote :

AND ANGEL KICKS TWISTA IN THE PELVIS AS WE RETURN FROM COMMERCIAL! During the commercial Both men somehow got on top of the turnbuckle, where Twista knocked Angel into the tree of woe. It was there that Angel did a BACKFLIP and hit Twista with SAID KICK TO THE PELVIS! EN NINO PLANTER OUT OF NOWHERE!, WAIT, NO, TWISTA REVERSES IT INTO A GANGSTA SHIRANUI OUT OF NOWHERE!!! Twista pins! 1...... 2.......... Angel kicks out! Twista then pulls Angel to his feet and goes for a FALCON ARROW, but Angel counters and hits Twista with a FALCON ARROW OF HIS OWN!!! Angel then follows this up by locking TWISTA INTO A MEXICAN ARM BAR!!!!!!!! TWISTA THEN BELIEVES IN HIMSELF SO HARD THAT ANGEL IS FORCED TO BREAK THE HOLD! Twista then CARTWHEELS and HEADSCISSORS ANGEL INTO THE ROPES!!! TIGER FEINT KICK!!! TIGER FUCKING FEINT KICK!!!!!!! Twista SPRINGBOARDS OFF THE ROPES- NO, ANGEL CATCHES HIM AND SENDS HIM STRAIGHT TO MEXICAN HELL WITH A DEATH VALLEY DRIVER FROM HELL!!!!!!!!!!!! Angel then pulls Twista to his feet and FUCKING ANNAHALATES HIM WITH THE EL NINO PLANTER!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! That's not enough though, Angel then LOCKS TWISTA IN THE DRAGON SLEEPER!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! TWISTA TRIES GOING TO THE ROPES, BUT ANGEL IS A MASTER OF RING PSYCHOLOGY AND MAKES SURE THAT SHIT DOESN'T HAPPEN!!!!!!!!! TWISTA HAS NO CHOICE!!!! HE TAPS!!!! HE TAPS!!!!!! HE TAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAPS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! ANGEL WINS, ANGEL WINS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

[1:33/2:00]

NEVILLE RYAN PROMO TIME

Quote :

After the Angel/Twista match, Neville Ryan is seen in a hallway backstage with John Hardcore. Neville talks about how now that he’s done with that disrespectful punk “gangsta” Twista XL, he can go onto things befitting the – he pulls out the 3XW World Title – 3XW World Champ. Neville explains that not just an athlete, but a man, a role model, of his caliber, shouldn’t have his time wasted by some punk. Let’s not get stuck on Twista, though, he’s an after-thought now. Neville is an undefeated World Champion, and as such, deserves much higher honors. And, not to get self-absorbed, he can’t forget about the fans. They’re crazy about him. Yes, this is all for the fans. For. The. Fans. But seriously, Twista can suck a dick. So can Travis Jones. Neville then walks away…with class.

OMEGA PROMO TIME

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It’s time for the main event! But first, as Omega makes his way to the ring, he cuts a promo! Cyrus got lucky the last time they fought, in that acclaimed Ironman match, but this time, no one will be saved by the bell. No matter how smart Cyrus may think he is, Omega has Cyrus’ number this time. And even though it is in non-title action, Omega will beat Cyrus, earn a title shot and then go on to beat Cyrus again and become the EFNW World Champion! Omega then throws the mic and waits as Cry of the Banshee hits.

CYRUS BLACK vs OMEGA - NON-TITLE

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Suspense is in the air as- HOLY SHIT OMEGA WITH A GIANT LARIAT ON CYRUS!!! Yea, you show that Linch kid, Omega, THAT'S how you do a lariat! Cyrus is like "Shit... That kinda hurt", but since he's Cyrus Mothafuckin' Black he just completely no-sells it afterwards and chops Omega across the chest. Omega is like "Da fuck?" before HEADBUTTING Cyrus right IN THE FACE! Cyrus stumbles back and SMIRKS, after which he then GOES for a ROUNDHOUSE KICK, but OMEGA ducks it and CATCHES Cyrus with an AMAZING CAPTURE SUPLEX INTO THE ROPES! Cyrus then slowly gets to his feet, surprised how insanely bad ass Omega is. Omega then goes for some type of Firemans Carry move, but Cyrus reverses and hits him with a TORNADO DDT FROM THE 11TH SECTOR OF HELL!!! Cyrus is then like "Ha, let's see you get up from-" AND OH MY GOD OMEGA USES HIS LIGHTNING FAST GAZELLE REFLEXES AND SPEARS CYRUS OUT OF NOWHERE! Omega pins... 1................. 2........... CYRUS KICKS OUT! Yes, Cyrus is truly THE MAN. But Omega doesn't give a fuck AND SUPLEXES HIM OVER THE TOP ROPE BUT CYRUS KEEPS HOLDING ON AND THEY BOTH GO TO THE OUTSIDE!!! Both men then get to their feet as fast as possible in order to gain the upperhand, but they instead end up clotheslining each other AT THE SAME TIME! Omega gets up first though, as he HAS the POWER! THE POOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEERRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRR. PERIOD!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! BAM! GIANT UPPERCUT FROM OMEGA! OH! KICK FROM CYRUS! PUNCH FROM OMEGA! ATTEMPTED POWERSLAM BY CYRUS! BUT OMEGA POWERS OUT OF IT AND SUPLEXES CYRUS OVER THE BARRICADE!!!!! Omega thinks Cyrus is done for, BUT SUDDLENY CYRUS COMES FLYING OVER THE BARRICANDE AND CLOTHESLINES THE SHIT OUT OF OMEGA!!! Everybody thinks that Cyrus now has the upperhand, but out of NOWHERE Omega pulls Cyrus TO HIS feet and SPINEBUSTERS HIM ON THE CONCRETE MAT!!! Omega tries to toss Cyrus back into the ring, but Cyrus somehow regains enough strength to SPEAR OMEGA RIGHT INTO THE STEEL STEPS! Cyrus then rolls in and out of the ring to avoid being counted out, before going back over to Omega and punching him in the face repeatedly until he's not able to smell anymore. He then goes for a Side Stepping Banshee Kick, but Omega catches him and DRAGON SCREWS HIM INTO THE MIDDLE TURNBUCKLE!!! Omega then pulls Cyrus to the middle of the ring and drops him down with a giant OMEGA DRIVER!!! WAIT, NO, CYRUS SOMEHOW PROTECTED HIS HEAD! HE COMPLETELY NO-SELLS IT AND DROPKICKS OMEGA IN THE FACE!!! Cyrus then uses whatever is left of that fucking steroid induced retard strength that he has and goes for the Journey's End, but Omega unhooks his legs and grabs Cyrus by his NECK and flips him over with a FUCKING BARRY WHITE DRIVER!!!!!!!!! BARRY WHITE DRIVER!!!!!!!!!!!! BARRY WHITE DRIVER!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! OMEGA PINS!!! 1.......................................... 2.................................... CYRUS SOMEHOW KICKS OUT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Omega then does one of his signature taunts, but Cyrus then suddenly kips up and ARM DRAGS OMEGA OUT OF NOWHERE!!!!!!!!!! OMEGA NO SELLS IT AND GETS BACK UP! ANOTHER GRUESOME ARM DRAG FROM CYRUS!!! HOW IS OMEGA ABLE TO SURVIVE SUCH PUNISHMENT??!?!??!?!?!?!?!?!? Cyrus then spins Omega round and hits him with a fucking DESCENT INTO SHADOW!!! Cyrus then audibly mumbles "Don't say I didn't warn you, faggot." before going to the top rope and HITTING A SPECTACULAR (SPECTACULAR (SPIDERMAN)) NAIL IN THE COFFIN!!! CYRUS PINS...................

1..................................................























2...................................................















HOLY SHIT NO, OMEGA KICKS OUT!!! YEEEEEEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA, Cyrus then grabs Omega and repeatedly kicks him in the skull until he's knocked almost as retarded as Linch was earlier tonight. Cyrus then goes to the apron, springboards off the ropes and HITS OMEGA RIGHT IN HIS TEMPLE WITH THE MOST INSANE DROPKICK I'VE EVER SEEN!!!! Cyrus pins.... 1................. 2....................................... NO!!! I SWEAR TO GOD THAT OMEGA IS GOD OR SOMETHING. I'VE NEVER SEE ANYONE KEEP KICKING OUT AFTER SUCH PUNISHMENT IN MY ENTIRE MATCH WRITING CAREER!!! Cyrus then decides that he's had enough and HITS OMEGA WITH A CROSS LEGGED MODIFIED REVOLUTION BRAINBUSTAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! CYRUS PINS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! 1!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! 2!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! ................................................................... 3!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! YEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH, CYRUS WINS, CYRUS FUCKING WINS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Cyrus gets his World Title and stands in the ring over Omega as the show fades out…

[1:59/2:00]

IN CLOSING

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…to another segment. Warren Peace, Aidan Steryo, and Scott Gone are in a kinda-dark office around a table. They’re watching EFNWrestling and see Cyrus go to the top rope as the fans cheer loud as fuck. All 3 men seem to be pleased as Warren leans back in his chair, along with Scott. “Let’s make it our own”, he comments as now the show fades out.

LE FIN

@1HarryJones: "Broken neck ... end of wrestling career. You are an absolute cunt, Dustin Shore!"

Kira wrote:

@1HarryJones: "Broken neck ... end of wrestling career. You are an absolute cunt, Dustin Shore!"

@ShoreLeave: Yeah, sorry about that, dude. Totally my bad.

So, what'd you faggots think of that awesome show?

.nova. wrote:

Alex Nova's theme hits.. yes.. he hasn't left. So yeah, he walks out onto the stage when the rapping part to the song playing starts. And he comes out with the Revolution title around his waist. He walks down the ramp completely showered in boo's and smirks after what happened on EFNW. He enters the ring and raises the mic.

Alex Nova: What a great match don't you all think so? I thought it was great.. but anyway, the guy actually showed me something. That he wants this title really badly eh? Didn't you see his mouth foaming up and what not, yeah that was brutal. And he attacked me like some savage dog, I mean anyone's first instinct is to run away when a dog is after you right? i couldn't let him hurt me. So Riff, tonight I'm out here, like a man, and I'm going to take what you said, or what you asked of me before. You want another shot at this title? You will get it. Because, I am putting this title, on the line, at the next pay-per-view. The fans want to see two men, who want to maul the hell out of each other, then so be it. It will happen. You requested 9...10, referees watching my every move.. no no no.. my title.. my rules. At the pay-per-view, it will be Alex nova, versus Riff Radley, for the Revolution title in a Last Man Standing match. And to fire up the tension, let's make it a loser leaves EFNW match. To end this shit once and for all.

The fans seem to like it, Nova smirks again, lowering the mic down to his waist, awaiting a response from the back, as fans start to get fired up, and burst into chants.

"Best Around" by Joe Esposito plays and the crowd goes into a FRENZY~!! Now, we're not just talking about a Hardcore Demon reaction, or a Harry Jones reaction, or even a Cyrus motherfucking Black reaction, we are talking about THE loudest crowd REACTION ever! It's like a bunch of CHEERS and ABSOLUTELY no one is booing or even NOT cheering! You know WHY? Because IT'S Warren Peace AND SCOTT GONE!! Warren Peace, not just the International superstar, he's the Intergalactic superstar! He has been to space and wrestled there for astronauts and aliens' entertainment alike! He has been to the highest and lowest peaks on Earth to train! Alex Nova should feel damn-well lucky to receive a visit not just from this exemplary man, or human, but this exemplary being that sets a universal standard of awesome! Oh, and Scott Gone's too. An aid rushes to get Warren a mic as him and Scott stand on top of the entrance ramp, but Warren easily pulls one out of his dress jacket's pocket, since he's also one of the greatest magicians to ever life. He flashes the attendant his awesome smile and all of a sudden the attendant stops in his tracks and goes starry eyed. This is the best day of his life! Screw his kids being born, this is Warren Peace! Warren then does the same to a row of chicks in the crowd, who faint, forcing EMTs to rush to them. But that's alright, it's Warren Peace and the EMTs are happy to clean up after him! Warren then turns his attention to Nova.

"Alright, Alex, this isn't the old EFNW. You and Riff both have a lot of talent, and I'd hate to see either of you go. Both of you have great potential, especially in EFNW, but to have a Loser Leaves EFNW match...that's just not something I want to do. This isn't the old EFNW, with Travis Jones, who always used to pull publicity stunts, light people on fire and the like. This is a newer, more pristine EFNW. As for it being your title, that is true, but I also like Riff's idea. How about we have the Nowhere to Hide match anyways? Not for the title, though. You see, Surge had quite a bit of fun when he booked you vs Riff in that hands-tied-behind-the-back match. But, I don't feel it offered quite what either you or Riff wanted. So, we WILL have the Nowhere to Hide match, not for the title, and if Riff beats you, he gets the title shot in a Last Man Standing match!"

Warren poses as the crowd goes absolutely freakin' wild! Scott Gone is there too.

I Fap to Noeleen wrote:

So, what'd you faggots think of that awesome show?

Fucking Fantastic. Could have used more tits though. More tits makes everything better.

The Legend of Casey wrote:

I Fap to Noeleen wrote:

So, what'd you faggots think of that awesome show?

Fucking Fantastic. Could have used more tits though. More tits makes everything better.

Agreed.